Brays Of Our Lives

The Incomparably Splendid Pants

art by Sue Kroll

You’ve heard, I’m sure, of Orangey-Pants,

In satin coat she’s dressed.

Pants walks up stairs, she blazes trails,

She even eats baguettes.

She herds the geldings to and fro

And keeps a tidy place,

A tough old mare when on the go

but dainty—full of grace!

So clean, so neat, so dignified, 

So beautiful and smart—

Dear Pants has earned a following 

With great displays of heart.

Divine, sweet Pants, and delicate, 

Yet stoic to the last,

She’ll not refuse a toothsome treat

Nor turn from lively tasks.

Pants does her job with auricles

A-pricked with eagerness,

Three cheers for darling Orangey-Pants,

Who represents Muleness.

She stands for all that’s worth a stand,

She’s perfect, even—yes,

Sweet Pants is all a mule should be! 

Quite simply, she’s the best.